I'll be seeing you partner

Last week I was contacted by a telegram  (txt) from an old acquaintance who was good friends with an old gunslinger I knew who taught this cowboy how to drive steel horses ( trucks ) when I was at the young age of 23 I have found out to my horror he has been diagnosed with three different types of cancer!!

 

I've journeyed back from my place of work to my original prairie over 1600km ( 1000 miles ) away to trot back into my hometown.

To see this old gunslinger what seems to be for the last time, now I hope not but I feel this to be so!!!

To put it mildly I'd say the next time I see him will be when they lower him into the grave, I reckon life needed another helper in heaven.!

 

Life huh, it can shine bright on you like a saloons neon lights or it can tear you down like an abandoned warehouse.

As I rode my horse into the night over  many distant dusty trails heading back home a feeling of memories fell upon me about the times and trials of the sweet yesterday's when that old cheeky gunslinger was teaching this green horn new tricks.

 

I've been present at his birthdays, and weddings and shin digs expanding over nearly two decades.

A wiry old gunslinger who taught me more than how to drive steel horses, he has over time embedded me with such skills of wit, character and one liners which I will be indebted to him till my days are gone.

He knew my mentor back when I had peace in my prairies a time long gone from now, he worked with my brother and half brother as well, like a band of outlaws we rode together over different times and different places and through it all I'll never forget the many adventures we had as co- workers but mostly as close friends

 

But alas life once again has bestowed upon me great sadness and I bow on one knee again as another posse member has his grave marked and his tombstone waiting and a hole dug and once again I'll be listening to the preachers words of dust to dust ashes to ashes.

An old familiar tale which of late is becoming all too familiar.

 

I guess as I look back when I was a younger man I thought we were all invincible just like in a day dream but here now in these twilight years death has somehow become reality as each day passes.

Yes death comes to us all in the end, one by one the mistress of death with her lantern seeks us out through the night and we can't run nor hide and she pulls us into her dark realm much like a spider does pulling its victim into it's web.

The old times in the end will always get replaced by that of the new times and so shall it be......

The chronicles of our time line in our lives is a fascinating tale in which we all have lived, laughed and loved and experienced the many different and wonderful trails.

 

In the end it's safe to say we are all haunted by people and their memories that they have left behind with us, some good ones some bad, some lost in the winds of time, some still present, but no matter if we are separated by time or mere distance or in life and or in death we take those we love with us wherever we go in the here and the now.

 

As we sit around our own campfires I imagine we all have empty seats where once great men and women occupied them throughout our lives but they no longer do, however we once had the privilege to be around them and they have enriched us by sharing their time here on this dust ball and even though their chairs they may no longer inhabit they will somehow always belong to them.

Their presence will linger long after the flesh in spirit and in our hearts and eventually as our own campfires dim within our own allotted time we will come to feel the cold as our fires burn and then simmer from a flame, then dance slowly into a smoulder then into smoke until the last ember slowly fades like an early morning dream we will remember the fallen until we too become the fallen 

 

As in life so often it gives in one hand what it takes from the other.

I have learnt life is merely a combination of time!

Time spent there, time spent here buried within us is a population of many memories which are made from moments with people who we have shared time with.

 

Time, money and love is what someone once told me fuels life and most will disagree with that statement but truth be told we will all know this to be true in the end and Personally I kind of agree with my friend.

These three pillars time,money and love are the building blocks in which we all build our very foundations on.

These three ingredients mixed right can bring  such contentment.

On the other hand a lacking of any one of these three key ingredients can create a crack in the foundations of our very existence causing irrefutable damage to some degree.

I don't have the answers to which I seek nor the desire to find them out anymore.

I think no matter how much we try to tick the boxes and cross our T's and dot our i's it truly won't matter for when our individual campfires do burn to nothing more than fading embers we will all still have in our heart of hearts an unfinished life.!!!! 

 

I suppose in the end......

There will come a day for all of us where I won't even bother to look around as I hear the footsteps in the dark nearing my campfire or get my trusty six shooters locked and cocked, I'll just say in a raspy voice to the shadowy figure which will no doubt be the mistress of death - 

" I've been expecting you "

As i sit there on me log and take one last swig of whiskey from me flask then I'll lay my head back catching the last flurries of warmth from the fire closing my eyes and drift away never to awake from slumber 

 

So my old gunslinging pard, we will meet again some day, I will be honoured to place two coins over your eyes to pay the ferry man in which I almost know him by first name basis, I'll extinguish another candle as I scratch my chin and wonder there ain't too much more left now, 

6 tombstones lay in hollowed ground where 5 years ago none did, the mistress of death even took me friendly feline.

I will say this, if there is an after life I hope to see my friends and posse and we'll drink and be merry and recall these times spent together  here on this dust ball as we forge a new beginning and create all that was good and could be again.!!!

 

So I will leave you with this story or a quote that I stumbled upon....!!!

 

 

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter’s departure had been announced. 

Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said: “I wish you enough.”

The daughter replied, “Mom, our life together has been more than enough. 

Your love is all I ever needed.

 I wish you enough, too, Mom.” They kissed and the daughter left.

The mother walked over to the window where I sat. 

Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry.

I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, “Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?” “Yes, I have,” I replied. “Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?””I am old and she lives so far away. 

I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral,” she said.

When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, “I wish you enough.” May I ask what that means?”

She began to smile. “That’s a wish that has been handed down from other generations. 

My parents used to say it to everyone.” 

She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more.

“When we said ‘I wish you enough’ we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them”. 

Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory,

“I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.

I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.”

She then began to cry and walked away.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person. 

An hour to appreciate them. 

A day to love them, and an entire life to forget them.

 

 

 

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Comments (16)

  1. shadowstarz

    Heartbreaking, is an understatement ! Wishing you and yours enough…

    March 08, 2017
    1. wonderwall79

      Thank you my friend yes indeed the good and bad of life

      March 09, 2017
  2. morningafter7

    I am touched, wonderwall. You’ve expressed so much here in this post. Doesn’t it make is scary to have people in your life who you really care about and love? We all want and need this, but at the same time know that nothing is forever. My only consolation, if that’s even possible, is that if nothing else – we all have this one thing in common. All we can do is stay positive and hope for the after-party in some kind of “afterlife”! Sorry for your sad news.

    March 08, 2017
    1. wonderwall79

      Well MA7 your quite right, it is life and the one common denominator we all.
      Yes but funny thing is I wouldn’t stop making good connections with people cause there are ones out there worth my time and effort to know them, such as yourself and other here, albeit we all only know each other through our avatars it goes to show that we were all meant to cross paths I feel.!!
      Oscar Wilde said a quote – Don’t worry about life too much none of us are gonna get out of it alive
      MA7 it’s sure gonna be a big shin dig of an after party then lol
      Thanks for your opinion I value it always

      March 09, 2017
      1. morningafter7

        I love that quote, wonderwall – SO true! Can’t sweat the small stuff for sure. And you’re right that connecting with good people is what makes life interesting! There is something to be said, for sure, about those of us who’ve made a connection through this rather obscure and random website… ;-)

        March 09, 2017
        1. wonderwall79

          Bang on the money MA7 but I’m not surprised that you are , yes it’s funny this sight I recall many moons ago joining and I nearly quit Afew times, but the great ones I have found here make me carry a smile most times I converse with them, many miles may separate some of us, but there’s some I feel I’ve known in alternate times as such be as strange as that sounds.

          March 10, 2017
          1. morningafter7

            I call that being in tune with other senses we humans have but may not always know it. Kinda like that synchronicity thing we talked about before: certain people being meant to cross paths. I’m starting to be a believer of that! And lord knows this place has gone through some tough times yet a few of us have stayed and/or come back! Hmmm….

            March 10, 2017
            1. wonderwall79

              Yes I was and am still intrigued with that synchronicity theory.
              As I swig me whiskey down by my campfire it is indeed a head spinner, yes we have come back and gone, gone and come back why welllllll one wonders perhaps in another life time we rode in the same posse !!!
              There’s people I have found even by just share feeling that there was something about them that allures me to them a feeling of knowing them in another time, sort of thing very interesting MA7.!!

              March 12, 2017
  3. SEC

    May you have enough busyness that resting seems sweet
    May you have enough rest to tackle the challenges of life.

    March 08, 2017
    1. wonderwall79

      May you have enough words you confuse simple minds like me haha
      May you have enough good smart friend

      March 09, 2017
      1. SEC

        If I believe I have confused you what is the “special” this week

        March 09, 2017
        1. wonderwall79

          Hahaha mmmmm let me think for a moment

          March 10, 2017
  4. tiggers

    Hugs to you my arms can reach pretty far

    March 09, 2017
    1. wonderwall79

      Hahah thank you my dear friend yes a hug is always needed

      March 09, 2017
  5. macabre360

    I know only too well when it comes to this final hand. All my fine feathered birds of me old school days have all flown this coup. Save for one such high plains drifter who’s campfire light is and will always be a most special sight for a Bird to navigate as I flap through my night. Sometimes like now they be only embers in a low glow. Most times profoundly bright. Which be a very important beacon to a certain bird I know.
    To all the birds and drifters we’ve known who have now already flown. With his beer and a shot I wish them to know we miss them a lot. Take care wonderwall. We still have a ways to go.

    March 09, 2017
  6. wonderwall79

    Arghhhhh my feathered friend the voice of reason up above a noble and wise voice to boot.
    Yes I have few left me self counting on one hand is all that remains.
    I will say the same, your a welcome friend to any of my campfires and without you at the fire it will grow duller.
    Yes I’ll raise my bottle In Honour too for mine and yours and whoever sits at my campfire surroundings
    Yes all it does is make me pull down my hat further and tread further into life’s storms with the will of them all guiding me
    A pleasure of the highest kind good sir
    Tipping my hat once more

    March 09, 2017